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Need to connect to other fathers

WayneDwyerWayneDwyer Posts: 4Member Listener
edited September 2016 in Parents and carers
I am the father of two girls the youngest born with Spina Bifida and now coming up 10 years. I have struggled coming to terms with her disability and have tried my very hardest to be the best father possible but feel I fail miserably on every count on most occasions.
Feel I need to connect to other fathers sharing similar difficulties and experiences where I can.

Replies

  • GeoarkGeoark Posts: 1,186Community champion Pioneering

    Hi Wayne,

    I'm the father of a daughter with Aspergers. My relationship with my daughter at that age was in a very dark place, though at the time we had constantly been told there was nothing 'wrong' with her. I hated the cycle we had got into and blamed myself as the adult, and even went to the doctor at one point as I was genuinely concerned I might lose control and hurt her. I was told that as I was aware of the possibility it won't happen and not to worry about it.

    Being told she may have Aspergers actually helped me to discover who my daughter was and started a very difficult journey in changing how I reacted as a parent and the type of parent I was. Though my initial thoughts was that she would be better off if I wasn't around.

    My daughter is now 24 and we have a very close relationship and have done for a number of years now, even though she remembers clearly what it was like back then. So things can be turned round.

    Despite what people say good parenting is not built into us and most parents do the best with what they know. Most parents make mistakes if they want to admit to it or not. The good news is things can change.

    I am happy to discuss things with you, and will be honest in my responses.

    As an individual I stood alone.
    As a member of a group I did things.
    As part of a community I helped to create change!

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