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Hi, my name is Kathy_Bramley!

Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 132Member Courageous
edited February 2017 in Welcomes and introductions
Hello! You may have seen me commenting elsewhere somewhere, on disability, gender sexuality, faith and political issues and geekery. Currently unemployed genderqueer christian SJW and poet - NOT to be confused with Cathy Bramley the author of novels. I have SpLD and mental health problems, quite possibly dyspraxia/DCD and/or ASD!

My children are 10 and 12, one in mainstream one in a general special secondary, both with autistic (and PDA) traits and challenging behaviour and many differing talents, the younger diagnosed with autism a few years ago though I kind of knew without being desperate to get the diagnosis or differentiate from and the older with brain injury from neonatal sepsis, with related cortical visual impairment.

My husband fits in, but holds the fort. His university department senior IT support role became too much. We are currently without obvious future income. I haven't worked since I worked part time for three years at checkouts but gradually broke down, couldn't do it, after failing uni and a subsequent NVQ, and generally struggling with social and household and practical tasks and not getting overwhelmed or making a mess of things or being quixotic or odd in the wrong place. I love my children but struggle with some things and worry less about others. Or find different strategies work, different things hurt me.

Everybody in this house has sensory sensitivity, and I have been getting severe PMS too. But I am not sure about going to the GP because I also have mixed up feelings about my gender identity and that generally. I always knew I was different and so did others, I and was bullied quite badly, because they could. I was always interested in disability and difference, grew up reason the guardian and watching See Hear and Asian Eye when nobody was up, my aunty worked for community transport and then CVS, my mum is a labour party activist and typist cum bookshop owner.

My LEA schools were stuffed full of lovely lefty feminists who didn't know how to help and tended to dichotomize me or go blithely Pollyanna and let things slide as much as I did. Minimize or explain away the difficulties or simply pass on frustration. Same comments on work right the way through. My own hang ups and history don't necessarily make we a warrior for my children or always knowing or doing the right thing.   I find few people understand me and know how to help me, but I see things from many angles, often from the child's angle when discussing something in other forums with parents. 

I have an interesting perspective on lables, diagnosis and care because I had internalised anxieties that I had to deal with. And there was more stress about identification or not, or allowances or not, than help and connection for me. It's all maps, a layer of language that partially describe the lay of the land. It's more about calm and assertive anxiety management and problem solving, and tact, and connection. But then, that's something I also struggle with. 
Lucky unlucky
Guess my diagnosis,
It may help, but
Don't guess my kids's

Replies

  • Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 132Member Courageous
    Sorry. tl:dr heh heh. Sorry. That's a difficulty I have.

    Two kids, 10 and 13, with different but similar needs, four way meltdown possible in this house, probably autism or dyspraxia myself. 
    Unemployed poet, amateur philosopher, geek, and slacktivist SJW. Not to be confused with novelist Cathy. 

    I may have to get a job. Argh. 
    Lucky unlucky
    Guess my diagnosis,
    It may help, but
    Don't guess my kids's
  • Sam_ScopeSam_Scope Posts: 7,580Administrator Scope community team
    Hi @Kathy_Bramley welcome to the community!! You sound really interesting, I look forward to chatting with you! 

    Have a look around the community, the recent discussions is a good place to start or look through the categories.
    Scope
    Senior online community officer
  • bambam Posts: 331Member Pioneering
    Hello @Kathy_Bramley welcome to the community. I hope everything is going good in your life. Looking forward to chatting with you in the future and reading all your interesting posts.
  • Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 132Member Courageous
    Thanks, Bam! 
    I don't know how interesting I've been so far, but I am trying. Yahoo featured me in an article on twitter posts about accessible veg, avocados, and I also posted a meditation on computer games, life skills and housework which is an interesting thread.  :)
    Lucky unlucky
    Guess my diagnosis,
    It may help, but
    Don't guess my kids's
  • Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 132Member Courageous
    I've also been active-ish in replying to people. 
    Lucky unlucky
    Guess my diagnosis,
    It may help, but
    Don't guess my kids's
  • bendigedigbendigedig Posts: 254Member Pioneering
    Hi Kathy

    Pleased to meet you :)
  • Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 132Member Courageous
    And you @bendigedig
    Lucky unlucky
    Guess my diagnosis,
    It may help, but
    Don't guess my kids's
  • Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 132Member Courageous
    What does promotion to levels mean, please, @Sam_Scope?:
    Lucky unlucky
    Guess my diagnosis,
    It may help, but
    Don't guess my kids's
  • lailalaila Posts: 48Member Connected
    Hi Kathy
    Pleased to meet you
  • Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 132Member Courageous
    Hi @laila, thanks! 
    Lucky unlucky
    Guess my diagnosis,
    It may help, but
    Don't guess my kids's
  • Sam_ScopeSam_Scope Posts: 7,580Administrator Scope community team


    What does promotion to levels mean, please, @Sam_Scope?:


    Hi @Kathy_Bramley the more you post and the more 'likes' and 'awesomes' you get mean that you will be promoted to higher levels of membership.  It shows others that you are a trustworthy member.  

    As a community user you can earn badges for doing or achieving certain things, such as making a certain number of comments, being on the community for a year or more, or receiving a certain number of ‘likes’.

    These badges also reward you with a certain number of points, which in turn allow you to progress through the various ‘ranks’ of community membership, which are as follows: Listener, Whisperer, Talkative, Chatterbox and Brian Blessed.

    Badges and ranks are intended as a fun way of showing how much members contribute to the community. Once you reach the level of ‘Whisperer’ (25 point), the ability to send private messages is also enabled. You can view your current rank on your profile page, next to your username, and your current number of points can be found in the ‘About’ section of your profile. Over on the right hand side (or at the bottom of the screen on a mobile device), you can also view the badges you have earned.

    You can read more in the How To Guide here.
    Scope
    Senior online community officer
  • Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 132Member Courageous
    Thanks, @Sam_Scope
    Lucky unlucky
    Guess my diagnosis,
    It may help, but
    Don't guess my kids's
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