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DannyMooreDannyMoore Posts: 634Member Chatterbox
Hi Community,

last year in June lots of children and teenagers started bullying me. It reminded me of how many bullies I faced during childhood. The bullying ended over a month ago but I'm still thinking about it, whenever I'm unoccupied it's the first thing I find myself thinking of. I'm obsessed with bringing an end to bullies.

I can't stop fighting my obsession so it's consuming me, I can't seem to accept that there will always be bullies. Can any of you provide any advice about overcoming obsessions? Any advice I will appreciate.
Don't Fear Your True Self


  • Rainbow_wheelz16Rainbow_wheelz16 Posts: 27Member, Community champion Community champion
    I too have experienced bullying and it is horrible and can have long lasting  psychological effects. Have you thought about  contacting your Gp. Maybe  counselling would  help?
  • Chris_ScopeChris_Scope Posts: 695Member Chatterbox
    edited February 16
    HI DannyMoore, I think if you were bullied as a child, and this was undoubtedly an intense emotional experience, then it seems natural that the same thing happening again would trigger similar feelings. As for the obsession, I wonder if you've considered seeking counselling or another form of professional help such as CBT?

    Speaking as a layperson only, it may help to identify what triggers your obsessive thoughts and to distract yourself with other more positive things that you find engaging in these situations. You might also like to take a look at some of Mind's online resources, such as this page on obsessive compulsive disorder.

    I hope this helps, and that the community can offer further advice, but please remember that the best person to advise you in this matter is a qualified mental health professional. There's some info on the NHS website about accessing mental health services, but referral to these will generally need to be done by your gp if you choose to follow this route.
  • joannarashellejoannarashelle Posts: 135Member Chatterbox
    I agree with what the others say @DannyMoore re asking for help, cognitive therapy helped me change my way of thinking or at least identify what can start it off; it's an on going process and can be exhausting and painful but beneficial in the long run honestly. 

    If you do go down the therapy route make sure you feel comfortable with the therapist you're offered. 

    This is is important. 
    And change if you need to, it's their job to enable you to feel better with your thoughts it's what they're trained and paid for.

    I've been bullied throughout my life and like you I wish there was a simple answer to wipe it out alas there isn't. 

    But you CAN change how you yourself deal with it in your head 

    Hope you get peace 

  • DannyMooreDannyMoore Posts: 634Member Chatterbox
    Thank you all, thanks for the sites @Chris_Scope.
    Don't Fear Your True Self
  • DannyMooreDannyMoore Posts: 634Member Chatterbox
    I had a brief reading about OCD and CBT. Just after reading a post in 'Reasons to be cheerful' by @BetweenBakerSt  I caught myself jumping to negative conclusions nearly making me act on assumptions.

    @BetweenBakerSt wrote;
    Spending time with friends who accept and understand my impairment without drawing attention to it and making me feel like just another member of the group!

    I jumped to the conclusion that before BetweenBakerSt was accepted as a member of a group BetweenBakerSt was being started on even though it doesn't say so. I've realised that my obsession has being caused by jumping to negative conclusions and acting on assumptions.

    Knowing what's caused it is a good start.
    Don't Fear Your True Self
  • Chris_ScopeChris_Scope Posts: 695Member Chatterbox
    @dannymoore, it sounds like a positive step that you were able to a)acknowledge that you were having a thought which might not reflect the reality of the situation and b) challenge it with alternative interpretations. It might help to write down such incidences in a journal or similar, and I believe there are various CBT worksheets available online which may help with this. Again, this is meant only as general advice. Hope you have a good weekend!
  • DannyMooreDannyMoore Posts: 634Member Chatterbox
    Things seem to be getting better, less obsessed after reading more about OCDs. I've managed to learn some methods like saying "STOP" in my head when the thoughts are repeating themselves. After stopping I ask, is this thought an assumption or a fact? Once I realise the obsessive thoughts are just assumptions and everyone with perceived differences are not going through all the abuse I've gone through, I can just get on with my day without being feeling so anxious or depressed.
    Don't Fear Your True Self
  • Chris_ScopeChris_Scope Posts: 695Member Chatterbox
    Hi Danny, it's great to hear that you're making progress and are starting to feel better about this, and thank you for sharing your experiences with the community. No doubt it will be a gradual process but this positive progress must feel very encouraging to you.
  • DannyMooreDannyMoore Posts: 634Member Chatterbox
    Thank you for your support @Chris_Scope.
    Don't Fear Your True Self
  • Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 130Member Talkative
    What kimd of obsession? Brain Lock on the OCD UK webpage is good. Especially the refocus step. "Eyes on the prize". Roll with it, but whatever you decide is best to be doing, focus there, not on whether you are or whether you're obsessed, but this is a skill that takes practice and time to learn.Be gentle with yourself.  
    Lucky unlucky
    Guess my diagnosis,
    It may help, but
    Don't guess my kids's
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