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Stress and cognitive distortions

BeccaHBeccaH Posts: 7Member Listener
edited May 2017 in Mental health issues
Hi, 
I'm hoping someone can help, I'm off work as of a few days ago. I was duty manager at work and due to the workload, thought patterns and stress I had had quite a bad reaction. I never realised that the condition could have such a negative effect on my day to day life mentally. Now I don't know if my day to day interpretation of things is correct or not? What can I do to sort this out?

Replies

  • GeoarkGeoark Posts: 1,074Community champion Pioneering
    Hi @BeccaH have you spoken to your doctor about this?

    You are obviously a capable person, and life or work can occasionally over take the best of us when we don't expect it. Finding someone independent who you can talk things through and get a fresh perspective on the situation and things you are concerned about. 

    As an individual I stood alone.
    As a member of a group I did things.
    As part of a community I helped to create change!

  • BeccaHBeccaH Posts: 7Member Listener
    Yes, ten minutes wasn't really long enough. I have had a difficult relationship with my manager the last few weeks. She is at the point where she is putting serious amounts of pressure on me. She just wants to hand over the reins completely..and last week was just too much. I have never told my employers about my condition because I didn't think it was necessary..however now I realise I might have to be more upfront. My thought patterns completely got the better of me, to be honest I've been completely in the dark about them myself until now. It was a bit of a shock, I have a mind matters phone call tomorrow. 
  • GeoarkGeoark Posts: 1,074Community champion Pioneering
    @BeccaH yes ten minutes is too short, but would have hoped your doctor might have referred you to some type of talking therapy.

    Thing is something like this is going to knock your confidence in yourself and as you mention question yourself. I had a huge confidence issue as a child and this had a knock on into adulthood. Even now in my mid 50's I regularly put myself down and doubt myself, even though I know I am good at what I do and generally recognise when I don't know something and need to ask.

    As I said in the post above you are obviously a capable person and this has not changed. From what you described the failure was not yours but your manager.

    I am generally in favour of disclosure as it gives your employer a chance to support you, but in some circumstances it can backfire. If the employer is generally positive towards disability go for it. If not give it some consideration, particularly if the current situation with your manager is likely to be a temporary issue or long term. 

    But in the end you have to do what is right for you, and once disclosed the employer should put in support to help and support you.

    As an individual I stood alone.
    As a member of a group I did things.
    As part of a community I helped to create change!

  • BeccaHBeccaH Posts: 7Member Listener
    Thanks for your help Geoark. I am capable, and at the age I am don't really want to start disclosing anything. I had a good chat with mind matters this morning and feel much better about things. I started last week in a negative frame of mind because of the issues I've had with my manager..it was probably miscommunication mostly. I feel a lot of the time though she wants me to be quicker, faster and generally better at my job. However I have been doing it for a long time and supported her in many different ways. My mind just goes a bit crazy when I'm stressed and tired, I have an online CBT course to work through.
    We'll see how that goes..Thanks again for your help.
  • RebeccaMHadvisorRebeccaMHadvisor Posts: 99Member Courageous
    Hi @BeccaH

    It is important to remember that many people will suffer stress at work at some point in their lives and you are not alone. What you are feeling and have experienced is normal. You don't have to say anything to your employer if you don't feel comfortable doing so and it's great that you have sough help and are starting to feel better about things. 

    There are a couple of things that might help you deal with your work related stress moving forward. 

    Recognising your triggers can help you to manage them moving forward.
    Setting boundaries so that you can achieve a work life balance. Living in a 24/7 world isn't healthy for us so switching off your notifications and making sure that you don't answer work emails at home can help.
    Make sure that you look after yourself, eating and getting a good nights sleep as well as taking your annual leave when you need to recharge.
    Find healthy releases. I have worked with many people who would open a bottle of wine after a hard day but this can make things worse. Yoga, swimming, meditation and mindfulness are all healthier alternatives.

    The online CBT also sounds like a great start.

    Rebecca

  • BeccaHBeccaH Posts: 7Member Listener
    Thanks Rebecca, I'll work through this glitch I'm having at the moment. Unfortunately my thought processes, stress and extreme tiredness conspired against me in spectacular fashion..I had an amazing congnitive distortion and now I'm off work. Going forward I'm not sure how I'm going to handle explaining the reasons for what happened last week but that is a problem for another day..the most important thing is I feel much more like my normal self again because this sort of thing happens to everyone from time to time. Thanks again for your advice.
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