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My girlfriend said the other guy was the best sex

So I was dating my girlfriend for 4 years and we had a falling out. She met another guy and it didn't work out so now we are dating again. She has always told me I was the best sex shes ever had but I went trough her phone and when she was with the other guy she told her friend he was the best sex she has ever had. Now I just don't want to have sex with her anymore because im pretty intimidated and hurt. What should I do? 

Replies

  • wildlifewildlife Posts: 1,316Member Pioneering
    @marcus121 Well you can't tell her you went through her phone. I suggest you change your whole way of thinking about your relationship with her or any other female. Close relationships are not all about sex. Where does love come into it ? Or respect for that matter? Think about it! Sounds like your girlfriend thinks pretty much the same as you do so maybe it's time to look at whether the two of you are right for each other with, or more importantly, without sex..
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 689 Listener
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  • TopkittenTopkitten Posts: 1,003Member Pioneering
    I would agree with some of the comments. Checking her phone shows a total lack of trust and a relationship will not last without trust. It sounds like you are hanging on to her just to avoid being alone. Not a good basis for any sort of relationship.

    Just try to get out more and make friends with women rather than constantly looking for a girlfriend. If you can successfully be friends it will often lead to more in a much more healthy way.

    TK
    "I'm on the wrong side of heaven and the righteous side of hell" - from Wrong side of heaven by Five Finger Death Punch.
  • PSHEexpertPSHEexpert Posts: 168Volunteer community adviser Pioneering
    I'm sorry to hear that your relationship has had such a rough patch.  I wonder whether you and your girlfriend were really ready to get back together after your big falling out?  Like some of the other comments here I agree that you shouldn't feel like you need to go through her phone, because that tells me that maybe there's a bit of a lack of trust.  That's not a very good basis for a relationship and I'd be worrying more about that bit than anything else if I'm honest.

    With regards to how "good" someone is at sex - we're all different and very importantly we are often different with different people.  I would focus on communicating with whoever you have sex with next - whether you try and work things out with your ex or whether you meet someone new  - and take it slowly, build up trust, and be really honest about what you both want and expect.  Good sex will more likely come from those things than anything else.  The other thing that I often say to people is that we don't just automatically know how to be "good" at sex - it's something that we learn, and we learn best through asking questions, listening to the answers...and practice ;)   Don't let her comments put you off.  
    - Gill 
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