Saw myself on video and surprised to see what my symptoms look like

jmurph1965

I have had spastic diplegia my whole life due to complications at birth.  This led to arthritis in my twenties and knee replacements when I was 43.  I  also had tendon transfer surgery when I was 35.  Since my knee replacements I have felt like my SD has been getting worse.  I have always walked unaided but I now struggle with walking any distance at all due to pain and fatigue.  I trip frequently because the bottom of my feet don't always clear the ground when stepping forward.  I feel like my legs are tighter than they've ever been and I have trouble stretching properly on my own.  Last night I was being videotaped while rehearsing for a concert with friends.  While watching the playback I saw myself moving around for the first time in probably a few years and I was devastated to see how bad my symptoms have gotten and how awkwardly I move and stand.  I am recently divorced and I fear that this is an issue when I meet new people who are turned off by problems although no one would ever admit that.  I am worried for my future.  I don't want to be alone and I don't want to live my remaining years in a wheelchair.  I don't know anyone my age with these issues and most of the online advice I find is geared towards children.  Loofing for advice.

Sam_Alumni

Hi @jmurph1965 welcome to the community and thanks for sharing your story.  Im sorry you are struggling, we have spoken abut dating and disability a lot on the community, take a look at the relationships category and the CP category.

CockneyRebel

Hello and welcome

There are many option open to you and plenty of information on this site.
Please let us know if we can help in any way


CR

Sam_Alumni

Hi @jmurph1965 How are you?