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Asperger Marriage

fifibrownfifibrown Posts: 1Member Listener
Hi there this is my first post. I'm Fiona and I have a teenage son with Asperger Syndrome (ASD) and I'm sure my husband of 15 years also has autism/Aspergers. It has lead to a lot of communication difficulties over the years. I just wondered if anyone else is in a similar situation and how they have dealt with it.


  • DannyMooreDannyMoore Posts: 702Member Chatterbox
    Welcome to the community @fifibrown,

    I have Asperger's Syndrome myself and socialising, communicating and interaction are my biggest difficulties. Social communication and interaction are the difficulties all people with autism spectrum disorders share.

    Your son and I sense the world differently to people without autism so we react differently to situations. With our brains wired differently we don't relate to others as much making people exclude us. My social difficulties made me leave school with only one friend.

    I dealt with it by learning about autism so I could understand my differences and know that it's no one's fault and to find the positives. Many symptoms of autism are actually advantages, trying to keep everything the same makes them gain the quality of consistency. Obsessive interests; people on the spectrum are extremely focused and detail orientated on what they're interested in. Because of this it's been hypothesized that 90% of the technology we have today came from minds of people on the spectrum. I actually class Asperger's as part of my identity, once the meltdowns ended I classed autism as a gift!

    Watch on YouTube or Google; Through Our Eyes Living With Asperger's.
    Don't Fear Your True Self
  • Mia_ScopeMia_Scope Posts: 29Member, Helpline Whisperer
    Hi @fifibrown

    You could think of contacting Relate Derby, who has been offering their telephone helpline to families and individuals affected by Asperger Syndrome (AS) for many years. This takes calls from people across the country. Our counselling team have specialist training to help them to meet the needs of individuals, families and couples dealing with Asperger Syndrome and other types of Autism. Our LiveChat Drop in is also staffed by counsellors experienced in supporting people affected by AS.

    You may benefit from this Partners section from NAS, or their Real Life Stories from Partners pages. 

    If you are interested in resources, you could try the following: 


    ‘The Other Half of Aspergers’ by Maxine Aston

    ‘Loving Mr Spock’ by Barbara Jacobs

    Alone Together by Katrin Bentley 

    Resources for Parents 



    Story is about a man with Asperger's Syndrome struggling with relationships, particularly with his girlfriend. 

    There is also Books Beyond Words and Jessica Kingsley Publishers which offer resources for autistic individuals and their families. Just type in any relevant keywords into their search boxes.

    Lastly, for parents there is also the Parent to Parent service from NAS on 0808 800 4106. This will enable you to speak to another parent who understands what it’s like to raise an autistic child. They are an emotional support service, so you are free to talk about your emotions, thoughts, and they will be there with a non-judgmental listening ear. It is not a manned line, so you would have to leave a message on the answering machine and someone will call you back.

    I hope this helps.

    Best wishes, 


    Helpline Information Officer
    Phone: 0808 800 3333
    Email: helpline@scope.org.uk
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