If this is your first visit, check out the community guide. You will have to Join us or Sign in before you can post.

Having difficulties logging in or resetting your password?


Please email [email protected]

I have bipolar disorder and Aspergers, struggling after leaving a psychiatric hospital

xanthemitchellxanthemitchell Posts: 3Member Listener
edited October 2017 in Mental health issues
I have been struggling a great deal. I left a psychiatric hospital after a two week stay due to suicidal thoughts. It stemmed from my Fiancé breaking up with me and the only reason he gave me was that he was better off by himself. I didn’t notice myself getting gradually more ill. I’m moving back to live near my family over 300 miles away whilst grieving for the relationship. I have got to move on but it takes time. I have bipolar disorder BPD and Aspergers. Would be great to hear from anyone. 

Replies

  • Mia_ScopeMia_Scope Posts: 32Member Connected
    edited October 2017
    Hello @xanthemitchell

    Welcome to our Community, a place for you to share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences in a safe environment.

    It sounds like you have been going through a lot recently, and I'm really sorry to hear about this. 

    You are having to experience a lot of change and the stress that comes with it. The relationship dissolution, moving 300+ miles back home, having mental health challenges, and becoming more ill - it is a lot that you are dealing with right now. I imagine with Asperger syndrome this change is even more anxiety provoking. 

    I am glad you have reached out to try to get some support with this. Did the stay at the psychiatric hospital help at all? Do you have any other professional help at the moment? Are you on any medications? To help with the break up, you may want to think about talking through your feelings with someone. Consider contacting The Samaritans. Available 24/7, 365 days of the year, this confidential service is there for anyone experiencing feelings of distress, despair, or suicidal feelings. Their number is free to call on 116 123. 

    The most important advice I can give you is to please take care of yourself and be gentle on yourself. Understand that right now you are going through a lot, and it's going to suck for a while. You are going to feel waves of all sorts of emotions and that's natural with heartbreak and change. What can you do that will make you feel better? Could you write out your feelings in a journal, draw or paint, play games, meditate, listen to music, go out exploring new places - anything like that? They say staying busy helps, and even though it is a monumental struggle when you're in so much pain, it does help to occupy your mind with other things. Start small.

    Having BD, BPD, and Asperger's is a lot to deal with. You must be so brave and strong to be managing all of this and reaching out for support. It takes a lot of personal strength and courage to reach out - it means you want things to be better, you want to feel better...and that means you aren't giving up.

    Feel free to use this space to express yourself, and I am here if you have any questions.

    All the best, 

    Mia
    Mia
    Helpline Information Officer
    Phone: 0808 800 3333
    Email: [email protected]
  • Sam_ScopeSam_Scope Posts: 7,732Administrator Scope community team
    Hi @xanthemitchell welcome to the community, it sounds like you are having a really tough time.

    Such a big move is bound to be stressful, are you looking forward to being closer to family? Do you think the move will be a positive change for you?

    We have a friendly community here, so do chat with us. We also have a mental health advisor so if you have specific questions, then do post in this category.
    Scope
    Senior online community officer
  • Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 132Member Courageous
    Hiya. I'm not diagnosed but somewhere in this ballpark. Bit of crisis in my own way, rn. Not the worst, but not the best. Coping skills I've learnt at other times help. 
    I'm just saying hi really. 

    And you have got to go one step at a time, but seeing what those next steps or future steps are can be hard and near impossible, try to not to force yourself either way to think it over or to be business like and normal. 

    But try to find a balance between cosy constructive normalising/finding your way so as to not get stuck, and on the other side of it, being thoughtful and allowing the inevitable replays to gently flow through your head and process spin away without too much hard judgment or making too much of it.

     Life can be like a TV replay of a  western, try to let the distress and intrusive questions like bad guys in your mind ride through like tumbleweed in the storm. 
    A lot of the stuff is not business, it's just weather. Trusting yourself to fight the storm and nail things down or waiting for calm as appropriate is a big part of the skill that I have not entirely mastered yet. 

    But shifting your focus from the weather to the needier intentions, cues, values, goals is important. 

    That's my way of thinking in a combined way about mindfulness and problem solving and the Brain Lock method for intrusive thoughts, OCD and anxiety. And I am still working on it. Between quixotry, caring, relationship, self esteem and self expression. I should be greeting the new all set to the wind and determined. But I am not. I can't do it all at once. But maybe I can tackle each point of the compass at every round. Or within the weeks. I can try a gradual process on each front rather than get nowhere at all or swamped with any one area. And it's not all about an all embracing pressure for recovery asap either. Not at all. That of course can far too easily get into prescription of how to behave and be  and non acceptance and that isn't healthy. 

    Set a few goals. Think about doing them. Eat, sleep, wash, clean after yourself. But they can slide longer than we think without being catastrophic. 
    Each channel is a muscle still however. 
    I don't know if that works and makes sense as a way of putting it? 

    Hypocritical right now. And I need to do work, tidying paperwork, etc. But chill, one step at a time.  
    Lucky unlucky
    Guess my diagnosis,
    It may help, but
    Don't guess my kids's
  • Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 132Member Courageous
    Sending you my love. You can do this. This too shall pass.
    Lucky unlucky
    Guess my diagnosis,
    It may help, but
    Don't guess my kids's
  • xanthemitchellxanthemitchell Posts: 3Member Listener
    Thank you Kathy. Xx
  • xanthemitchellxanthemitchell Posts: 3Member Listener
    I am struggling with the move. I have three days to pack up and clean my house before the move back to the north. I have no energy. Luckily my daughter is coming down to help. Just got to push it. Once I’m there things will be easier. 
    It was so nice to see replies to my post. I feel less alone now. 
    Slept four four hours this afternoon. It’s part Aspergers (shutdown) and part overload on the bipolar and bpd. Got to stop beating myself up for having to take time out. I worry that people will think I am lazy. I can’t currently work and that compounds the thoughts of being a scrounger. 
    I go from feelings of positivity to despair. I know it’s my mental health but it is still a struggle. 
  • Mia_ScopeMia_Scope Posts: 32Member Connected
    edited October 2017
    I hope you had a nice weekend, @xanthemitchell

    Bipolar, BPD, and Asperger's... You know, you must be an amazingly unique, colourful individual. As much as these conditions negatively affect us, they also provide so many opportunities for things like empathy, creativity, and even humour. At least that's what I find.

    Part of your healing, recovery, and self-care is allowing yourself the time out that you need. You have to rest and take it easy. Moving is hard on anyone, it's such a stressful life event, but you know what? You can and will push, you will do this, and make sure to tell yourself how proud you are of all these small achievements. You're doing amazing. Great news you have your daughter helping you, doing it all alone is exhausting. Soon it will all be done and you will be settled in, just hold tight.

    By the way, I don't believe you are a scrounger, and you are not lazy. You can't help your situation and how it affects you. It's great that you have the insight to know that it's your mental health, and that you do have feelings of positivity. Keep doing the things that will help you relax and feel happy.

    I believe in you!

    Best wishes,

    Mia 
    Mia
    Helpline Information Officer
    Phone: 0808 800 3333
    Email: [email protected]
  • Kathy_BramleyKathy_Bramley Posts: 132Member Courageous
    I have found this quite helpful.
    http://www.bpdrecovery.com/separation-of-stuff
    Lucky unlucky
    Guess my diagnosis,
    It may help, but
    Don't guess my kids's
  • janinemason999janinemason999 Posts: 1Member Listener
    Hey hope you are doing better now? you are very brave and much stronger than you realise x
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 0 Courageous
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
Sign in or join us to comment.