i am finding life increasingly lonely as a carer — Scope | Disability forum
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i am finding life increasingly lonely as a carer

mariejess
mariejess Community member Posts: 1 Listener
Hi im new to the group and im mother to a young lady with a profound learning dissability im looking to make friends and for some morale support as i am finding life increasingly lonely and difficult due to my caring role and health issues ive recently suffered wich has left me feeling less than posotive about care in the community and support 
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Comments

  • Castleford1
    Castleford1 Community member Posts: 59 Courageous
    Hi Mariejess
    I have a daughter with learning disabilities and I have health issues of my own.  I do agree that being a carer can be lonely but I think it is important to join groups such as this who can advise us and provide support.
  • Sam_Alumni
    Sam_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,671 Disability Gamechanger
    edited January 2018
    Hi @mariejess
    Welcome to the community, it can be difficult to be a carer and many people talk about loneliness. 

    Are you able to get out of the house at all? Can you look for local social groups to you? The GP surgery, library or community centre are a good place to look.  I am a big fan of the Women's Institute, I have met so many new friends and learnt so much through mine.

    I hope you enjoy it here on the community, we are a friendly group and love to chat.

    We have a parents and carers category and you may also like to take a look at the Age UK website.
    Scope
    Senior online community officer
  • Sam_Alumni
    Sam_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,671 Disability Gamechanger
    I just read this article about overcoming loneliness, what do you think?
    Scope
    Senior online community officer
  • Sam_Alumni
    Sam_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,671 Disability Gamechanger
  • Ktmexc250
    Ktmexc250 Community member Posts: 14 Connected
    Hi. I too feel lonely. I am mum to a boy with DS. He leaves me too pooped to do anything.so you get left behind. This is the first time i've joined anything like this.so we can keep each other company! I'm hoping it will help to talk to others in the same boat..i have a feeling we're gonna need a bigger boat!!
  • annajj
    annajj Community member Posts: 16 Connected
    mariejess said:
    Hi im new to the group and im mother to a young lady with a profound learning dissability im looking to make friends and for some morale support as i am finding life increasingly lonely and difficult due to my caring role and health issues ive recently suffered wich has left me feeling less than posotive about care in the community and support 

  • annajj
    annajj Community member Posts: 16 Connected
    I understand how you feel ok. Am one parent to a disabled daughter who cebral palesy and austim. It dose get lonely I know. If you ever wants to chat feel free ok.
  • annajj
    annajj Community member Posts: 16 Connected
    Ktmexc250 said:
    Hi. I too feel lonely. I am mum to a boy with DS. He leaves me too pooped to do anything.so you get left behind. This is the first time i've joined anything like this.so we can keep each other company! I'm hoping it will help to talk to others in the same boat..i have a feeling we're gonna need a bigger boat!!

  • annajj
    annajj Community member Posts: 16 Connected
    Am in same situation with disabled child. So thinks we definitely need a bigger boat.
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 126 Courageous
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • Ktmexc250
    Ktmexc250 Community member Posts: 14 Connected
    Wow..this boat is getting massive. We need rules on our boat! No kids, lots of chocolate and coctails, Disco dance floor..dance like no one looking. Big comfy beds... no talk of, DLA, EHCP, professional services, what would any one else like on the boat?
  • kittycat
    kittycat Community member Posts: 8 Listener
    Yes, please! I like the sound of this boat ;-)
    I am a Carer to two boys one had learning disability, the other is non-verbal and had autism.
    I too feel lonely and often too exhausted to do anything! 
  • Ktmexc250
    Ktmexc250 Community member Posts: 14 Connected
    Welcome aboard! 
  • kittycat
    kittycat Community member Posts: 8 Listener
    Thank you!  :-)
  • annajj
    annajj Community member Posts: 16 Connected
    Hi kitycat I know the feeling being lonely and feeling exhausted. I got disabled child  with cebral palesy and austim. 
  • kittycat
    kittycat Community member Posts: 8 Listener
    Hello annajj :-). Yes, it can be hard at times. My hubby isn’t really a talker, my eldest is a teenager so prefers to be in his room on his PlayStation, and my youngest can’t talk!!!!
    I find that family and friends just don’t ‘get it’! So, it’s great to find like minded folk to have a talk/rant too! ;-) Xx
  • Ktmexc250
    Ktmexc250 Community member Posts: 14 Connected
    Hi shipmates! I find myself talking rubbish to anyone who will stand still long enough just to make myself feel human. I see people chatting and seemingly having a life and it can make me feel more isolated. No support network really. It would be nice to have a break when he's doing my head in. So, to be able to rant about random stuff on here to people who know what i feel like is a good outlet! 
    Let's make up a name for this boat..what about the good ship we rock?
  • Ktmexc250
    Ktmexc250 Community member Posts: 14 Connected
    Forgot to say..my hubby is a somerset farmer, so not big on talking and kids grown up and gone..fed up and lonely.
  • annajj
    annajj Community member Posts: 16 Connected
    Hi kittycat and ktmexc250.well am one parent raising a 11 year old and 12 years old child who disabled. Oldest children left home .so gets lonely sometimes .And as you said kittycatand family friends just don't get us . 
  • Ktmexc250
    Ktmexc250 Community member Posts: 14 Connected
    So..what's the answer? I tried joining groups, they drive me nuts. they are either full of young mums who i don' t connect with ( i'm 49) or people who just want to know what they can claim. I tend to say what i think when asked and some people don' t like that..blimey..i sound like a right old witch! I don' t know what the answer is, but for me, i'd just like to meet other people who know how it ACTUALLY is to have a kid with disabilities and not judge when i have a moan or a rant or not mention the kids at all.
    Love to get together with peeps sometime..
    We need names for this boat too.

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