Coffee lounge
If this is your first visit, check out the community guide. You will have to Join us or Sign in before you can post.

Community updates


• Read over some of our recent discussions and have your say!

• Upload a new profile picture and give your profile a personal touch.

• Get the latest information on issues relating to coronavirus.

Anxiety and Reality

debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
I get really scared when I am anxious and I think the worst will happen. I know it is my friend Fear sitting on my shoulder but I dont relax until the worry is over. My mum passed suddenly 9 years ago and now I expect the same to happen to my dad. He has many health problems and there are more tests coming up this week. I keep thinking he will die during it. Im scared of the results. I hate anxiety.
💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️

Replies

  • hartill77hartill77 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    Hi @debbiedo49
    Sorry to hear this! Have you been to the doctors? 
    Some techniques you could try are grounding exercises. 
    https://www.livingwell.org.au/well-being/mental-health/grounding-exercises/
    Charlene Hartill
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    Yes thanks its part of my mental health issues 
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • hartill77hartill77 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    @debbiedo49
    Have you tried CBT (Cognitive behaviour therapy) my doctor sent me for this and really helped. 
    There are some support groups that operate over the phone that could help as well. That's part of healthy minds I think. 

    Charlene 
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    Yes I have tried cbt when I first became unwell and would definitely try it again. I have panic disorder anxiety and depression and reviving from agorophobia . Part of my problem is over thinking and thinking the worst. Especially with my dad as he is getting on in years and has lots of health issues. I’m definitely over protective. I think I will calm down again after his appointment . Also with my mum her passing was sudden and I am dreading something like that happening again. 
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    I will be fine 
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • hartill77hartill77 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    I kept a worry diary for a few weeks which helped to put things into perspective! I hope your dad's tests go well. X
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    That’s a good idea ! I will try it! Most things I worry about are fine almost as soon as the fear goes away and the activity is in progress. Then it’s such a relief. Thanks . My dad doesn’t really take his health seriously but he hides it inside. He has short term memory problems and doesn’t know why he is having tests as he can’t remember. That’s a blessing and a curse. 
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • hartill77hartill77 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    I find once I write something down I can stop thinking about it as much.
    Sometimes making light of health is how people deal with it! 

  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    Yes you are right I used to write down my worries when it stopped me sleeping and it helped 
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    My dad passed away yesterday suddenly 
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • fishingmumfishingmum Member Posts: 562 Pioneering
    @debbiedo49I am sorry for your loss, I hope you will be ok and sending my best wishes xx
    life is too short to let others make you miserable.
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    Thanks I’m gutted x
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • WaylayWaylay Member Posts: 888 Pioneering
    Oh @debbiedo49, I'm so sorry to hear that. Do you have family/friends for support? Please take care of yourself.
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    Yes I’ve got people. Thanks for your kind words x
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    Turns out my spidey sense was working overtime again. 
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • hartill77hartill77 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    @debbiedo49
    So sorry to hear this! 😢
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    Yeah me too x
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • hartill77hartill77 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    If theres anything I can do to help let me know! Even if its just to talk. My dad past away 6 years. 
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    Thank you . My mum passed suddenly in 2009 and now my dad is gone it’s surreal. Feels like my dad is playing a joke on us and I’m waiting for “surprise!”
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • hartill77hartill77 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    I know how hard it is to lose one parent! I cant imagine how you must be feeling. I kept myself busy with funeral arrangements to keep me occupied. 
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    @hartill77 ive got two threads going on with this at the movement.  Dont know if you noticed? There is going to be a post mortem due to sudden death. We cant plan a funeral until thats over. Im just taking one day at a time trying not to fall over myself in my brain fog and grief. My poor son is the same, he thinks everyone he cares about dies. Just found out my dads cousin is dying or dead by now in a hospice. No one told us she was dying. I cant tell him. It sucks.
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    I still canny believe what’s happening. The funeral is June 5 that’s ages away and I’m barely functioning.
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • hartill77hartill77 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    Hi @debbiedo49
    I replied earlier but seems I must have previewed and not posted silly me lol. 
    Sorry to hear your  cousins dad has passed away too. 
    How old is your son? If it helped you before to write things down maybe thid could help for him too. 
    It's frustrating having to wait a long time for the funeral but it's best to find the results from  the post mortem. 
    My Daughter use to keep a scrap book about her grandad  when she was younger which helped her. 

  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    My son is 18. He was very close to my dad. He is being very strong and I’m keeping an eye on him. This will be his first funeral. We are talking things through when he feels like it. We are involving the adult grandchildren in the funeral and the great grandchildren are putting lettes pictures in the coffin. I am working on a shared photo album online so folks can look through it or add to it. The waiting is the hard part. Then it’s the healing part.  
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • hartill77hartill77 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    Hi @debbiedo49
    How are you holding up? 
    Sounds like your doing an amazing job with the funeral arrangements. I know it's hard to have to wait ,making it longer to have a final send off for loved ones.  Its good his talking things through with you when he wants, he knows your there to support him then when he needs you. 
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    Thanks , funeral tomorrow and then its done 
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
  • hartill77hartill77 Member Posts: 97 Courageous
    Hope it all goes well. 
  • susan48susan48 Member Posts: 2,229 Disability Gamechanger
    Hope your managing to get through today @debbiedo49 x
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,756 Listener
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • debbiedo49debbiedo49 Member Posts: 2,906 Disability Gamechanger
    Thanks guys it went well
    💜🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    I am a fibro warrior !💜♏️
Sign in or join us to comment.