Disabled siblings

Miltonk123

Hi, I am new here.  I have 2  younger siblings with Special needs.  My mum is their primary carer & she is 65 now & they are late 20’s & 30.  They are both wheelchair bound and need help for everything.  When I was 18 I moved out and started a life about 40 miles away.  We were never really a close family.  I am 37 now.  I am now very conscious of my mother’s age and mental and physical strength and feel that I need to step in and help.  Doing this would mean leaving my job which I’ve done very well in with few qualifications, as it’s very far away and probably moving back to my home town (which I hate).  I would probably have to leave my partner as I couldn’t expect him to change his life and move etc...
I feel guilty all the time.  Any advice would be good, my head is a mess.

Pippa_Alumni

Hi @Miltonk123, how's things?

I'm really glad to see you had some responses to this on your other post. Please do let us know how you're getting on!

Beverley_Scope

Hi @Miltonk123

It sounds like you are having a very difficult time at the moment. 

Have you thought about looking into getting a needs assessment for each of your siblings?

Getting a needs assessment

If you think you, or someone you know, needs help to cope day-to-day, the first step is to get a needs assessment from your local council.

You'll need to have this assessment before the council can recommend a service such as:

• equipment like a walking frame or personal alarm
• changes to your home such as a walk-in shower
• practical help from a paid carer
• day care for your child if either you or they are disabled
• access to day centres and lunch clubs
• moving to a care home

The following link will take you to the NHS website which could help you.  

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/social-care-and-support-guide/help-from-social-services-and-charities/getting-a-needs-assessment/

I hope this helps a little.  

Beverley