Disabled parent with children — Scope | Disability forum
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Disabled parent with children

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mic0001
mic0001 Community member Posts: 5 Listener
edited June 2019 in Children, parents, and families
Hi I'm a 64 year old man with 4 children I'm there only carer as my partner left us 3 year ago i can't drive and because of my illness we feel let down by everyone and even though I remain smiling it is just a mask for my kids sake 
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  • April2018mom
    April2018mom Posts: 2,882 Disability Gamechanger
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    Hello and welcome to the community. I too am a 22 year old dyscalculic mom of two children. They are now 2 1/2 years old now. Are you seeing a therapist or not? When the kids were babies I had a counsellor for a while it helped significantly with my coping skills. I was able to vent in a safe place. 
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  • CockneyRebel
    CockneyRebel Community member Posts: 5,209 Disability Gamechanger
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    Hi @mic0001 and welcome

    It sounds like you do have your hands full. Is there anything we can do to help ?  do you have any questions ?

    How old are your children ?
    Be all you can be, make  every day count. Namaste
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  • mic0001
    mic0001 Community member Posts: 5 Listener
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    Hi mate the kids are 20 19 14 12  year old but they all suffer with mental illness because of their mother who abused them 
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  • janer1967
    janer1967 Community member Posts: 21,964 Disability Gamechanger
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    Hi I am a wheelchair bound 51 year old mum to a 12 year old son . I worry all time how this affects my son and his childhood he is my only source of help. We used to have very full life b4 I became disabled and I hate that I can't do the things I want with him . He has had to grow up quick but we have an amazing bond. I just wish I could take him out more. 
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  • CockneyRebel
    CockneyRebel Community member Posts: 5,209 Disability Gamechanger
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    I am sorry to hear that, you must be some kind of super hero :)
    It can be a little quiet at the weekends but usually someone here if we can help or you just need a bit of a rant
    Be all you can be, make  every day count. Namaste
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  • mic0001
    mic0001 Community member Posts: 5 Listener
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    Mate I'm sick of ranting about it, it all seems to fall on deaf ears 
    I don't want to rant in front of the kids anymore as it upsets them to much  but thanks for listening 
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  • mic0001
    mic0001 Community member Posts: 5 Listener
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    Once again we have been let down by the local authorities we were visited by our social workers support and we told them needs as a family 
    I was advised by them that they would have my wet room which was adequate for my needs when I first became ill but is inadequate now I suffer from double incontinence they sent me a higher toilet seat to use a frame to lift my riser recliner chair up but they couldn't get me one because they say they are not allowed to fit them on reclling chairs. I ask them why would I need a toilet seat as I don't use the toilet in fact they wasted my time and there's by coming at all because of my disabilities my children are being targeted by the local children and bullied at school but they have done nothing and the police say they don't have the resources to help us I'm at the end of my tether 
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  • Antonia_Alumni
    Antonia_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 1,780 Pioneering
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    Welcome to the community @mic0001 how are you doing today? I am sorry to hear this, has there been any changes made now? I can understand how frustrating this must be.

    I am sorry to hear about your children being bullied, have you informed their class teacher or head teacher? How are they doing? 
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  • Braddaz
    Braddaz Community member Posts: 3 Listener
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    I'm 47 with 14 year old. MS getting much worse and I feel very alone too. 
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  • mic0001
    mic0001 Community member Posts: 5 Listener
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    Hi Antonia scope we as a family have been in contact with the school and social services also police and the local authorities but we live on people who are not or don't want to help on the situation we are in the school have said they will look into the bullying but never do the authorities say they cant move us away from the estate were we live police say they can do nothing until they have proof social services just keep giving us advice as if we are stupid 
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  • Antonia_Alumni
    Antonia_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 1,780 Pioneering
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    Thank you for your reply @mic0001 that's awful, I am sorry to hear you and your family are going through this. I'll tag in our parenting advisor @KellyParentAdvisor and @Emma_Scope from our Navigate services and hopefully they can offer some advice.
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  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 0 Courageous
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    Hi @mic0001

    I'm Emma from the Navigate Team. I'm so sorry to hear about what you and your family are going through at the moment. It sounds as if you've done the right thing in approaching the school, but, if you don't feel they have listened to the next step may be to ask for a copy of the complaints procedure and then follow this by making a complaint in writing. Writing a letter to the school is a more formal way of letting them know about your concerns and finding ways in which they may be able to support. Once you've given in the letter the Head must respond in writing, and if you're not happy with the outcome you can take you're concerns to the board of governors and see if they can resolve things. Please see the link below for further information.

    https://www.gov.uk/complain-about-school/state-schools

    There are also a few charities out there that can offer more specific support on bullying, again, I've put a few links below. 

    https://www.kidscape.org.uk/advice/

    https://youngminds.org.uk/find-help/feelings-and-symptoms/bullying/

    https://www.bullying.co.uk/

    I hope this helps.
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