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Hate crime

jonesrem4jonesrem4 Posts: 8Member Connected
edited September 10 in Autism and Aspergers
Hi. I was wanting some advice or help please.
I am the mother of two autistic young boys. I have one who's 5 and one who's 4. My 5 year old is in a mainstream school and my 4 year old is just starting at a specialist school. My 5 year old has now been at his school for over a year and absolutely loves the school, staff just the whole environment In itself. Hes very well liked at the school by staff and children. All of a sudden we had some upsetting very frustrating news that a group had been made on social media by a parent of a child in his class asking everyone to get him out of school, that he wasnt normal and the things they would do to him if aloud. Obviously this was a very very frustrating sickening situation. Myself and my mum went into the school to speak to the head about this to which she had absolutely no idea to be honest we didnt know alot at this time. Later on that day we was told it was 3 grown women that had took it upon themselves to make and slate my child in this group little did we know that one of the 3 grown women was someone who was working at my other childs specialist school and she was absolutely vile about my children.  She stated he should be in that school he should be in a specialist school with his spastic brother(her words not mine) absolutely heartbreaking. Can anyone suggest what I do now please?
Thank you 


  • OverlyAnxiousOverlyAnxious Posts: 111Member Pioneering

    You can report this sort of thing to the police on the non-emergency contact number.  I'm not sure what they'll do about it though.

    I would also suggest showing it to the head of the specialist school as it involves one of their staff!

    You can also report it Facebook to have the group removed.

    Is there any particular incident that might have triggered it out of interest?  I just don't understand why it's any of their business which school your child attends!
  • Adrian_ScopeAdrian_Scope Posts: 2,984Administrator Scope community team
    edited September 10
    Hi Remmie and a very warm welcome to the community. :)

    Before you do anything @jonesrem4, I'd suggest getting any evidence of the group you're able to access, detailing any members or posts that you think support your case. Did the headteacher appear to take your concerns seriously?

    As one of the three women works at your younger son's school, please report this to both schools, the local education authority and put in a formal complaint via the headteacher and Chair of School Governors at both schools as well. 

    I also agree with @OverlyAnxious's advice to report this to the police as a hate crime/cyber bullying. 

    There is some advice regarding bullying on the Gov website here and Internet Matters has some other information that you may find of use.

    On a personal note, I'm so very sorry to read your post. Their behaviour is utterly inexcusable and I really hope you manage to find a satisfying outcome. Please let us know how you get on with this. We're here to support you, so if there's anything else we can do to advise, please don't hesitate to ask. 
    Senior Online Community Officer
  • CressidaCressida Posts: 90Member Pioneering
    @jonesrem4 I don't have any advice other than to report it to the school and the police as a hate crime. Anyone using words like that should never be allowed to teach again. Do make sure you have proper evidence though and it's not just hearsay. I'm so sorry for you. Some people are absolutely vile. :(
  • April2018momApril2018mom Posts: 1,660Member Disability Gamechanger
    Definitely report it to Facebook @jonesrem4.
    Keep a log of how many times in case. Take screenshots as evidence. Also inform the school of what is going on too. Ask to speak with the principal of the school. Request a meeting if possible. This is a serious matter. 
    If it escalates, contact your local council and the police. You can also make a complaint to Citizen’s Advice Bureau. 

  • jonesrem4jonesrem4 Posts: 8Member Connected
    I've contacted the police who said it's not a crime for the parent to make a group mocking a disabled child. I've been into both schools and nobody's really interested. I forgot to add that my oldest son who the group was made about his class teacher is facebook friends with the parent who made the group. 
  • jonesrem4jonesrem4 Posts: 8Member Connected
    My oldest sons school have contacted LADO who are supposedly doing an investigation. But my youngest son is doing his transition into his special school but one of the women In the group is a dinner lady there who is able to access his classroom at dinner time. So now my son cant go do full day as they dont want them to come into come into contact with each other after the vile comments she made about him. Surely this cant be right, wouldnt she be suspended until further investigation 
  • Adrian_ScopeAdrian_Scope Posts: 2,984Administrator Scope community team
    Hi @jonesrem4,
    I'm really sorry that they sound like they're not taking it seriously enough and I'm glad that LADO have been contacted. Are you aware that you can report it to LADO yourself? Also, if you would like (and are willing to provide us with some more details via email at [email protected]) we can offer to report it from our end as well.

    Your youngest son's school's handling of the case seems completely unreasonable. Have you been advised that he can't attend, or have you just made that decision while you wait for the investigation to go ahead?
    Senior Online Community Officer
  • OverlyAnxiousOverlyAnxious Posts: 111Member Pioneering
    jonesrem4 said:
    I've contacted the police who said it's not a crime for the parent to make a group mocking a disabled child. I've been into both schools and nobody's really interested. I forgot to add that my oldest son who the group was made about his class teacher is facebook friends with the parent who made the group. 
    I'm surprised the police aren't interested, even if no crime has been committed so far, this is the sort of the thing that escalates.

    The fact the schools aren't really interested either suggests it might be more common than we think.

    I hope you get a better outcome from the LADO investigation!

  • jonesrem4jonesrem4 Posts: 8Member Connected
    @Adrian_Scope ;
    It was advised by psych ed for there to be alot of transitions day as hes never been in a school setting before. His first transition morning ever was the one that this parent who works as a dinner lady was writing about in the group. So they've said it would be best for him to come in a morning at 9 until 11:15 as she comes onto site at 11:30. He attended the school Wednesday and Thursday when he was collected on thursday at 11:15 this parent/dinner lady was on site. I have rang them and asked why she was on the school site when it was agreed she wouldnt be there nobody has answers for me. What I dont understand is surely her discussing my child in a group would be breaking data protection and by her not reporting this group to any member of staff at any schools.
  • jonesrem4jonesrem4 Posts: 8Member Connected
    @OverlyAnxious ;
    The way it's coming across is that the schools just want us to be quiet and not say anything which is something I am not going to agree to.

    The class teacher from my eldest sons school is friends on facebook with the parent that started this group which raises concerns as they knew things about my child that you couldn't just guess.
  • April2018momApril2018mom Posts: 1,660Member Disability Gamechanger
    Good luck with the LADO investigation! Let us know what happens next @jonesrem4
  • newbornnewborn Posts: 290Member Pioneering
    Equality  Human  Rights  might advise?  Schools have statutory duty. Would they be happy if the staff member 's hate crime was racism?  Would the host/publisher of the group? All protected groups are  protected under the single equality act.
  • jonesrem4jonesrem4 Posts: 8Member Connected
    Hi I'm abit confused as to what you mean
  • newbornnewborn Posts: 290Member Pioneering
    There is an official organisation  EHCR with a free advice line and they are supposed  to help eliminate hate crime against one of the protected groups (gay, race, disabled,  age etc.)  What  happened is seriously wrong.
  • jonesrem4jonesrem4 Posts: 8Member Connected
    @Adrian_Scope @April2018mom @OverlyAnxious @newborn

    Just an update I rang my youngest sons school yesterday and spoke to the head teacher to ask why the member of staff was in school when my son was when it was promised she wouldnt be and he couldn't give me an answer as he didnt know. He was waiting for a phone call from HR and he was going to find out why she was on school site and ring me back to let me know. Anyway the day got on and I never ever got a phone call back. My youngest son is due to be back at school this coming week but I'm terrified shes going to be in the school again  as they've already lied and broke my trust. I cant send him as I dont want him to be a laughing stock for them.
  • Emma_ScopeEmma_Scope Posts: 46Navigate Courageous
    edited September 14
    Hi @jonesrem4

    I have to say this thread has been a hard read and I'm so sorry you and your family have had to go through this.

    Like a lot of other community members have said the actions of the schools involved doesn't appear to be reasonable. If you haven't already the next step may be to make a written formal complaint to both schools and the Local Education Authority and possibly to speak to your MP about this.

    https://www.parliament.uk/mps-lords-and-offices/mps/ - You can find out who is your local MP is via this link. They usually run drop in sessions so you can discuss it with them and they may be able to support you.

    Under the Equality Act disability is a protected characteristic which means this is discriminatory behaviour and should be taken very seriously. 

    You may also want to get in contact with your local Parent Partnership Service (PPS) or Special Education Needs and Disability Information and Advice Service (SENDIAS), you can find out how to contact them by completing a Google search (for example - SENDIAS "area that you live"). They provide information and sometimes advocacy for issues related to Special Education Needs and Disability (SEND) so they may also have some more advice you can follow.

    I hope this helps and I really hope things get resolved for you.

    Emma Bailey
    Parent Advisor
    Navigate Team at Scope
  • newbornnewborn Posts: 290Member Pioneering
    This is really important.  Bullies have no place being on a payroll anywhere they can victimise vulnerable people. 

    In disability campaigning l always use the racist comparison,  because people  'get it'.  Most officials live in terror of not ticking every box to take instant action where direct or indirect racism in their organisation could leave them exposed to accusations  of collusion or encouragement or tacit acceptance or failing duty to take effective action regarding  racism. 

    For some reason,  these same people need to have it spelled out that the single  equality  law  protects all categories.  

    Incredibly,  many, even to this day, cannot understand physical access issues.......

    Thank heavens your child has you to fight for him.  But you shouldn't have to.
  • April2018momApril2018mom Posts: 1,660Member Disability Gamechanger
    edited September 15
    This is a safeguarding concern. Have you talked to the LADO officer yet or not? Kudos to you for being a advocate for your vulnerable child! I hope that something is done about this. As a last ditch option, you could always go to the media with your story. Sell it as a human interest piece to catch their attention. 

    Try phoning the school up tomorrow. As a side note, you should research disability lawyers in case. Alternatively, you could take her out of school completely if they are not proactive enough for you and homeschool her instead. This is a last ditch option only however after all other options have been tried.

    Good luck! 
    Keep us updated. 
  • jonesrem4jonesrem4 Posts: 8Member Connected
    @April2018mom ;
    I'm going to ring the school first thing in the morning and discuss this. Nobody from LADO has spoke to me, should they have done?.

  • April2018momApril2018mom Posts: 1,660Member Disability Gamechanger
    jonesrem4 said:
    @April2018mom ;
    I'm going to ring the school first thing in the morning and discuss this. Nobody from LADO has spoke to me, should they have done?.

    Definitely telephone the school. Also ask the local council about a LADO investigation too. This is serious. Just make sure you have enough evidence to justify a investigation into what is going on. Do you have a timeline of events or not? It can help clarify things. I recommend calling the school tomorrow to see what their version of events is and then decide how best to proceed. 

    This is a flowchart of a typical LADO investigation 

    Keep us posted. Good luck! Try to remain calm. 
  • Chloe_ScopeChloe_Scope Posts: 3,940Administrator Scope community team
    I hope you get further with this after the phone call @jonesrem4. Please do keep us updated and let us know if there is anything else we can do to help. 
    Online Community Officer
  • April2018momApril2018mom Posts: 1,660Member Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @jonesrem4

    How was the phone call? 
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