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Hi, my name is peggy1974!

peggy1974peggy1974 Posts: 2Member Listener
Hi 4 years ago I went through 2 bereavement in matter of months of each other first was my dad who died of a brain aneurysm and colon cancer in June 2015 then out of the blue my youngest son was taken in to hospital September 2015 with suspected pneumonia  which turned out to be a cancer call glioblastoma grade 4 after 3 short weeks we had to make the decision  to turn his life support machine off and on the 3rd October at 18 48 he passed away  since then I have been struggling with sleeping eating and anxiety and depression  every time I go see my gp they advise me to see a councillor  so I go see a councillor  and they tell me that I'm not ready because of  my mental health problems can anyone help me please as I don't know what to do or where to turn 

Replies

  • chiariedschiarieds Posts: 723Member Pioneering
    Hi @peggy1974 - Welcome to the community which is both supportive & friendly. I am so very sorry to read about your losses. Sadly I also know how devastating it is to lose a child, whatever their age. We lost our youngest daughter, aged 23 months, a long time ago.
    Anyway, I will ask my friend @thespiceman to please help, as he will be able to advise on other ways to help with your mental health. I'm often here if you want to chat.
  • thespicemanthespiceman Posts: 5,355Community champion Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @peggy1974   Pleased to meet you. Sorry to hear what you have been through.
    I am one of the team of community champions. Thank you for mentioning me my friend @chiarieds .
    Please can sorry to hear that they think you not ready. Unfortunately that is not true in my opinion, you are suffering and need compassion , empathy.
    I hope today I can give you a lot of reassurance and lots of support.
    Your entitled to good mental health, I do think would be useful if you consider the three mental health organisations. I used.
    https://www.richmondfellowship.org.uk.
    https://www.mind.org.uk.
    https://www.rethink.org.
    The last one is an advocate charity, helps with problems with medical teams.  NHS services.
    All have floating support, welfare and much more. Lots of information and guidance on their websites. You can speak to your GP or self refer.
    Please can I also say have this bereavement charity Cruse.
    https://www.cruse.org.uk.
    Used these my self .
    Please if you have any questions please ask me, happy to help any time.
    Please contact me anything you concerned about, do have an interest in diet and fitness plus advice on sleep and medications. Have a lot of experience my own personal health issues including addiction. 
    Have health qualifications gained through the well being service. You local county council offer a lot. Has a community health unit.
    Something the charities I have mentioned will refer you to.
    Please can I add one final aspect of the links. Some areas are not covered. Due to budgets and costs.
    Please take care of your self happy to be listening.  Please keep safe and warm, your an valued member of our community.
    @thespiceman
  • AilsAils Posts: 1,141Community champion Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @peggy1974 and welcome to the Community.  It is nice to meet you.  I am so very sorry for your losses.  You have been through so much, but we are here to support you on the Community so anytime you wish to chat then someone will be here to listen.  You will find a lot of lovely supportive people on here and as @chiarieds has advised, @thespiceman is very knowledgeable with regards to mental health and will be able to help.  Please take care and keep in touch to let us know how you are getting on.  You are a valued member of our Community and are amongst friends on here.  All the best.
  • Adrian_ScopeAdrian_Scope Posts: 4,497Administrator Scope community team
    I cannot begin to imagine how you must feel @peggy1974. Are you getting much input from mental health support besides being referred for counselling?
    I hope TheSpiceman's suggestions are useful, but please let us know if there's anything we can do.
    Senior Online Community Officer
    Scope
  • peggy1974peggy1974 Posts: 2Member Listener
    Hi I'm getting no help what so ever I feel like im banging my head against a brick wall no one understands how I feel I have days where I feel so alone 
  • thespicemanthespiceman Posts: 5,355Community champion Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @peggy1974   Sorry to hear this . Please how can I help be supportive.
    Did you look at any of the links I gave to you.
    I want to reassure and give you some confidence, that there is help out there and much support .
    Please if I can ask is there any thing you want particularly from any service.
    I did know you have had a lot of problems and do understand a lot.
    Having a lot of knowledge and experience of services.
    many are struggling many of them with the current climates and situations.  Including underfunding and over burdens of work loads.
    Please if I can suggest think what you need from any service. I used to write this down and be precise clear and to the point.  When contacting organisations make it simple. I used to send vast emails got no replies precise clear and simple got me help. Plus any thing else discuss with them if and when they can discuss the plans you have as they will . 
    Know the issues you are going through.
    The one issues I have heard is the waiting times and the considerable over loading of services.
    This never your fault and please persist in contacting either any of the links suggested or if I can be of use. Look on line see what else there is.
    Speak to your GP.   Search local NHS services websites. I believe if you type in your postcode comes up local services to you.
    Please keep in touch happy to help.  Offer compassion and empathy any time to listen.
    Please take care

    @thespiceman
  • chiariedschiarieds Posts: 723Member Pioneering
    Hi @peggy1974 - I hope you've been able to look at some of the links my friend thespiceman has suggested. I've sent the link for the Richmond Fellowship to my daughter, as her husband lost his younger half-brother 2 years ago. I had a look around the website & found there was a place near them. I hope you might find the same. There are some lovely friendly people here, some of whom you've already 'met,' if you want to talk any time.
  • Adrian_ScopeAdrian_Scope Posts: 4,497Administrator Scope community team
    I'm sorry @peggy1974. I know all too well how incredibly frustrating it is to feel like you're not being heard. Are you engaged with social care at all? I would definitely try some of the links TheSpiceman has provided, if only to give you some options.
    Senior Online Community Officer
    Scope
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