If this is your first visit, check out the community guide. You will have to Join us or Sign in before you can post.

Having difficulties logging in or resetting your password?


Please email [email protected]

Am I crazy to give up social housing in this circumstance?

Angelic89Angelic89 Posts: 1Member Listener

After escaping severe family abuse, I was left suffering from devastating panic and anxiety attacks, depression and severe anxiety. The thing which I credit with giving me the only stability that I have ever known living for years in an amazing, large, beautiful flat with a wonderful housing association that I largely credit for saving my mental health and life. I count it as a family member, it is the only stability that I have ever known.

I count it as the best thing that ever happened to me (even people with mortgages want a place like this) however, I have to leave because the university I attend is in another city and I am very academic (I got all As at GCSE) and absolutely cannot stay in non-graduate minimum wage jobs for the rest of my life. It’s driving me insane. I thought I would be able to do university with the commute and work to hang onto it but by university is in another city in which there are no Home swap properties (for the last 6 months and I needed to move now) and time-wise it doesn’t work in the second year.

I realise this may be a very stupid decision as I was homeless/living in refuges before then (I have no contact with my dad who abused me and my mum who passed away, so I am essentially giving up ALL my security.

However, this is the only way to continue with my university studies and hence my life.

I am so much happier and more fulfilled with other students and in graduate-related careers. I have mainly worked in catering up until now, purely to keep my flat, but I'm in my late 20s and it doesn't suit me (or actually my panic and anxiety) at all and I must continue with my studies.

Like I said, I've tried to do Homeswap but there aren't any closeby and I have asked my landlord if they could intervene and find me something there but the Housing Association doesn't do housing there, so I'd have to go back to the council list and as I'm not technically homeless now this would be too difficult/long.

I trust the private landlord and she is really nice but I am so worried about giving up this security and going over to the private sector, especially with the way that the world is headed, my mental precariousness and life instability.

It is truly a beautiful property, but I can’t give up on my degree and future.

Anyone still think this is a crazy decision??

I have severe anxiety and depression and most private landlords will not take benefits should I ever have to claim them and obviously I have no family to fall back on.

It’s SUCH a difficult decision.

Any input appreciated.

Replies

  • MatildaMatilda Posts: 2,616Member Disability Gamechanger
    edited December 2017
    @Angelic89

    This is a truly terrible dilemma for you!  You really do have my sympathy.  I suggest that you list the pros and cons of each option.

    Is it really too difficult to stay in your flat and manage the commute to uni?  Could you possibly hang on until the end of this academic year and then take an intermission for a year during which time you might find a HomeSwap?
  • GeoarkGeoark Posts: 1,238Community champion Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Angelic89 and welcome to the community.

    I have thought hard about this and wondered what my advice to my daughter would be if this came up. It is not a crazy decision.

    Life is about taking risks and opportunities as they present themselves. While I understand your dilemma with your flat it sounds like going to university would also be a break from the security the flat has been to you  when you needed it most. But it also sound like it could become a hinderence in the future. 

    By making the break now once you have finished your course you are free to chase your ambitions where ever they may present themselves in the UK. 

    Going to university was one of the best decisions my daughter made and was the push she needed to make the transition between childhood and adulthood. While she came home at each holiday she grew an awful lot in those three years. She overcame many of the obstacles she faced as an autistic young person and went on to get a job she loves.

    Earlier in the process I might have suggested looking for a degree level apprenticeship, but as this is the opportunity which presented itself I would say go for it and I wish you well in your studies and future.

    As an individual I stood alone.
    As a member of a group I did things.
    As part of a community I helped to create change!

Sign in or join us to comment.