feeling very anxious about the past and the future — Scope | Disability forum
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feeling very anxious about the past and the future

onelife
onelife Community member Posts: 49 Courageous
Does anyone have trouble putting the past and the future out of your mind? I feel persecuted by intrusive negative thoughts from the past and terrible worrying about the future. Right now I am panicking that I just don't have a future, everything I have done in the past has just never worked out, I have left about a dozen jobs due to anxiety and fears over trouble with people at work. Now I have been unemployed for nearly 9 years and living on benefits.

Comments

  • Antonia_Alumni
    Antonia_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 1,780 Pioneering
    Hi @onelife

    Thank you for sharing this with us, I am sorry to hear you're feeling this. Please try to focus on each day as it comes, I know it's not easy. Have you seen your GP recently about this or are you getting any emotional support from counselling or support groups?

    Best wishes ;)
  • onelife
    onelife Community member Posts: 49 Courageous
    Yes, I have seen my GP recently and he has prescribed promethazine and I am to get to see a counsellor but don't know when.
  • EmmaB
    EmmaB Community member Posts: 263 Pioneering
    Hi @onelife

    I would recommend that you look into Mindfulness - which is about focusing on the present without judging or striving.  You can't worry or think about the past or future if you are focused on the present!

    I know Mindfulness might sound airy fairy on the face of it but there is a LOT of evidence that it works.  It takes practice and it actually causes positive changes in the brain if you can keep it going.  

    You can either find a local course or do it online - some good websites include: 

    www.franticworld.com
    https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/mindfulness/#.XGWLi-L7R-U
    www.bemindful.co.uk [they have an online course for £30]

    If you are having issues with sleeping then this is a good website with lots of things you can try to help yourself:

    https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/sleep-problems/#.XGWLpeL7R-U

    I hope that is helpful.

    Best wishes.

    Emma


  • onelife
    onelife Community member Posts: 49 Courageous
    Thanks Emma, I actually bought a book on Mindfulness which I really need to start reading. I've just been self-absorbed with my fears and anxieties that I find it really difficult to start taking in what I am reading.
  • EmmaB
    EmmaB Community member Posts: 263 Pioneering
    HI @onelife

    That's great you've already got a book!  Just try and start small - don't feel you've got to do hours sitting on a cushion... Just doing a minute of mindful breathing a day is a start and build from there.
    There's a very quick 3 minute breathing space on www.franticworld.com, see here:

    http://franticworld.com/free-meditations-from-mindfulness/

    [There's also one with chocolate if you like that!]

    Remember it's called mindfulness practice because it takes practice and you won't notice any immediate effect but changes will be occuring... I know before I did it I used to get really annoyed when people cut me up when I was driving or even just pulled in front of me, now it doesn't bother me at all, which I totally put down to mindfulness.  It just helps you be less reactive which is good if you are feeling anxious.

    Hopefully when you get some counselling that will help you actively challenge some of your thinking which means you'll have a technique for just observing and letting thoughts go [mindfulness] and one for challenge thoughts [CBT].

    If you like reading I've recently discovered Dr Rangan Chatterjee whose written two brilliant books full of advice and ideas:  The 4 Pillar Plan and The Stress Solution, he also has a great website:  https://drchatterjee.com/

    Good luck, it sounds like you want to improve things and this is always possible, not necessarily easy but possible!

    Emma
  • onelife
    onelife Community member Posts: 49 Courageous
  • Pippa_Alumni
    Pippa_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 5,793 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @onelife, really glad to see you've had some support from our community members.

    I'm not sure whether you're actively seeking work at the moment, but if you are then perhaps Scope's Support to Work service could be helpful, to help you find something suitable for you. Wishing you all the best!
  • onelife
    onelife Community member Posts: 49 Courageous
    Thanks Pippa, I'll look into it :smiley:
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @onelife Pleased to meet you .  I understand what you are going through.

    The difficulties is to find what you need to cope and deal with the insecurities and anxieties fears.

    You have been given a lot of excellent guidance and information. Plus support.

    I myself have anxiety and depression plus do know this feelings, emotions.

    I have written on the subject before and have found the best way is to find what do want from life. 

    My story is similar to yours in the sense been and done so much and have this baggage of failures.  Had issues with every one in work and places of employment.   Ran a business because did not fit in.

    Dead end and used relationships, friendships.

    Been twenty years ongoing ill and having issues yet have strived and struggled to maintain wellbeing . Found new avenues to look  at.

    As age in my 55th year I think this the best time.  Why what changed, how did I think positive not negative.  I will admit still have those days some times  we all do.  It is being focused on simply things and pleasures.

    Made a lot of changes. What did help was being involved with mental health charities having coping methods and strategies.

    Which I would recommend many have courses on sleep, coping with meds, lifestyle choices.  Usually in a group monthly meetings.  Where you learn to think and be aware of your own mental health.

    The floating support outreach workers are trained to help but also there not to run your life. That is your choice to apply.  Many on line.

    This is the one I used https://www.richmondfellowship.org.uk.

    One idea I use  which is making a list on a page the positivity . Your skills and talents, hobbies, interests. Things you like to do.

    On the other page the things, goals, aims and anything you like to attain. Could be anything you wish to.

    Sometime by seeing it written down and then you can look at see where the opportunities and aims, goals can be used in other sectors of life.

    Also my support worker who suggested al the ideas. Asked me to write everything about my life I hate and detest, lots of the anxieties, fears.

    After a month of a writing got a shredder on her advice and shredded the whole lot my life story. Wow certainly helps.

    That was the beginning got rid of fair weather friends, clothes I hated got new wardrobe. new furniture, diet and health.  Plus as I was an alcoholic and had been absent clean for about seven years then decided to use the health history I had to gain other qualifications.  

    Volunteer on here now fit in .  Like being the person I am.

    Always here anytime if you wish to chat or talk. Ready to listen,

    Remember this is you and small steps . Buy a diary to put in dates that you wish to do something. Be good and kind to yourself.

    Does not have to be complicated.

    Pleasure to talk to you.

    @thespiceman



    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
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  • onelife
    onelife Community member Posts: 49 Courageous
    Thanks @thespiceman I will take on board what you say. :)
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @onelife Thank you for comments.  Please if I can help or advise always ask.

    This forum has been the best thing ever because you are not alone and what your experiencing and feeling .  There are many in our community .

    To give you reassurance keep in touch if you wish to chat and talk happy to listen.

    Hope what ever you decide works out. My favourite story I recite to myself my mantra if you like is we are on a journey. With baggage in each hand. Do we throw stones in the path or do we go over them.  Or do we  go around.

    Something to think about.

    Take care.

    @thespiceman
    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
    Recipes
  • debbiedo49
    debbiedo49 Community member Posts: 2,904 Disability Gamechanger
    It is inmportant to find the right thing for you be it watching video, listening to mudic or white noise or reading about mindfulness. The most important thing is to begin. I have anxiety and depression and I know that being stuck thinking about the past or worrying about the future can be a hard pattern to break but you must break it. Find a way to just be present in the now. About 10 years ago I couldn’t read one line of a book as I couldn’t concentrate. Now I’m back to reading a book a weekend. It took time and mindfulness. White noise or binaural beats on YouTube helped me to stop my mind racing at bedtime and I started to sleep better. Then other things started to improve. Different therapies and medications can be useful as well. Good luck. 
  • onelife
    onelife Community member Posts: 49 Courageous

Brightness