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Son diagnosed age 21

Sueval
Sueval Community member Posts: 12 Connected
Hi, I am mum to a 25 year old daughter who has digeorge syndrome (heart defect, arthritis and thyroid problems etc) and a 21 year old son who has just been diagnosed with autism. 
My son has struggled with anxiety and depression since leaving school and had a very unhappy and lonely 3 years at university. He seems to have taken the diagnosis better than I have. I feel so guilty that he has grown up without support and understanding. He has said that it explains a lot.  I just hope that things improve for him. 
I am feeling very worried about the future for both of my children. Both are unemployed now and struggling to find work. They are both wonderful intelligent people with so much to offer. They both desperately want to have jobs and to be independent. 

Comments

  • Sueval
    Sueval Community member Posts: 12 Connected
    Hi, I am mum to a 25 year old daughter who has digeorge syndrome (heart defect, arthritis and thyroid problems etc) and a 21 year old son who has just been diagnosed with autism. 
    My son has struggled with anxiety and depression since leaving school and had a very unhappy and lonely 3 years at university. He seems to have taken the diagnosis better than I have. I feel so guilty that he has grown up without support and understanding. He has said that it explains a lot.  I just hope that things improve for him. 
    I am feeling very worried about the future for both of my children. Both are unemployed now and struggling to find work. They are both wonderful intelligent people with so much to offer. They both desperately want to have jobs and to be independent. 
  • Firefly123
    Firefly123 Community member Posts: 530 Pioneering
    Hi I'm the mother of 3 young adults all with Autism and other health issues so I understand your worries about their future. It's good your sons diagnosis helps him understand things better. All I can do is try to made them as independent as possible. Your not alone are many of us with the same thoughts and fears as you have 
  • Sueval
    Sueval Community member Posts: 12 Connected
    Thanks for your reply @Firefly123 It is good to know I’m not alone. I am trying not to cross bridges before  come to them. My son is very capable but just needs a lot of time and patience to learn new skills. My daughter also needs support but will use her initiative and has motivation which my son lacks. This diagnosis has just made me realise that my son’s won’t just grow out of his difficulties and he will need a lot of support to fulfill his potential. I have found a local charity who offer mentoring and peer support for adults with autism. Just hoping they are able to help my son.
  • Firefly123
    Firefly123 Community member Posts: 530 Pioneering
    Yes that's good if they can help. Your son sounds like a remarkable young man he coped before his diagnosis and that can only help him my daughter is the same she has more get up and go than both her brothers and only recently got her diagnoses and yes like you I felt bad as how could I have missed that but she's so much better at hiding it and more able than her brothers. 
    Sounds like your doing a great job 
  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Sueval

    Sorry to hear you are feeling worried, however this is completely normal. Here are some resources which may be of use to you 
    I apologise for the delay in replying, I was trying to find all the information that I think would be of use to you. Let us know if you need any further help :)
    Disability Gamechanger - 2019
  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Sueval I have included some links to resources which I think would be of use to you in your other post. Let us know if we can help further :)
    Disability Gamechanger - 2019
  • Beverley_Scope
    Beverley_Scope Scope Posts: 84 Pioneering
    Hi @Sueval

    It might be worth looking at Scope's online employment service.

    It has an online and telephone support program for disabled people who are ready to apply for jobs.

    https://www.scope.org.uk/employment-services

    Hope this helps.

    Beverley
    Beverley Davies
    Parent Advisor
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