World Suicide Prevention Day 2020- What are your top tips for mental wellbeing? - Page 2 — Scope | Disability forum
Please read our updated community house rules and community guidelines.

World Suicide Prevention Day 2020- What are your top tips for mental wellbeing?

24

Comments

  • RAwarrior
    RAwarrior Community member Posts: 430 Pioneering
    Hi @Tori_Scope

    Thank you very much?
     
    I also find it difficult to open up a conversation if I suspect someone has mental health issues so you’re not alone?

    The problem I have is with people whose intentions are not genuine because either they are trying to make themselves look good or the ones that say they know about psychology but when you actually need them they are the first people to run away?

    I would have more respect for someone if they had actually tried to help. I have already mentioned this but sometimes despite your best efforts you can’t help so it’s better to say so or if you can signpost them to an organisation that might be able to help.
    It’s better than telling someone “to move on” or “to pull yourself together” which quite frankly is pointless and does more harm.

    I would rather you started the thread as I think it would need some sort of introduction similar to the one at the beginning of this thread to explain the background or reason for the thread. 

    I think people like yourself and the other Scope Community Team are better placed to include the right information at the start of the thread as you know what to include or what information is appropriate if that makes any sense?

    I think the approach that you and the other members of the community team is excellent because it’s a balance between trying to help and support people whilst encouraging them to take steps to try to help themselves?

  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    Yes, that is frustrating @RAwarrior. It can be hard to know who to trust when opening up to people about your mental health.

    No problem :) I've added it to my list of things to get done this weekend! 
    National Campaigns Officer, she/her

    Join our call for an equal future.
  • RAwarrior
    RAwarrior Community member Posts: 430 Pioneering
    Hi @Tori_Scope

    I have learned who to trust and who to avoid when it comes to talking about mental health especially at work. A positive thing is that I know not to waste my time with people who I know don’t actually care especially because they are not the one with the problem.

    In my case the bully targeted disabled people or “sickies” as he called them and because he was fully supported by management he knew that he could bully people. Some people were not bullied by him as he left them alone meaning they don’t understand why I feel the way I do?

    Many people don’t understand how difficult it is to recover from trauma especially one that went on for years because he didn’t bother them. 

    Unfortunately he has been bullying people for at least twenty years and just gets moved to other locations so he can continue to harm others?

    Sorry for giving you additional work to do?

    Perhaps an idea to include would be the difference between having mental health issues which all of us have at some point which could include feeling stressed and actually having a mental health illness where there has been a chemical change within the brain. 

    There is a big difference between the two which are often confused. If someone is feeling stressed or anxious this could be part of every day life however, it becomes a mental health illness of which there are at least 200 different types when the chemical balance within the brain changes.
  • davegregson40
    davegregson40 Community member Posts: 83 Pioneering
    Thank you for sharing and this is a very important subject to talk about and only by talking about suicide can we help to prevent it and reach out to help others, its a global health risk and I recently had correspondence from the Center for Disease Control in the United States highlighting this. There are often no outward signs that someone is suicidal and there is nothing to be ashamed in openly and honestly talking about it anywhere like with any other major health condition such as for example heart disease or cancer 
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    Yeah, it can be difficult for people to understand @RAwarrior

    Ha, no, it's fine! I just wanted to reassure you that I will get around to popping it up. That's a good one :)
    National Campaigns Officer, she/her

    Join our call for an equal future.
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    Hear, hear @davegregson40
    National Campaigns Officer, she/her

    Join our call for an equal future.
  • Lou_Scope
    Lou_Scope Community member Posts: 21 Courageous
    Self care is very important to your mental health. I have many things that I do to make myself feel better. I realise not everyone will find these useful because your self care is personal to you and your needs.
    I like to exercise and find running or walking leaves me with a clear head. I find listening to music often helps distract me from negative thoughts
    Reading a good book can sometimes take you into another world for a short time.
    I have experienced times in my past when none of these things have helped and I’ve felt unable to do them.
    If that happens I have in the past visited my GP and they were able to offer cognitive behavioural therapy. Then I found myself able to look back on how strong I am having come through difficult times. 

    I found this really helpful to share and remind myself of my self care. :) 
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    edited September 2020
    Thank you for sharing your tips @Lou_Scope :)

    (and welcome to the community!)
    National Campaigns Officer, she/her

    Join our call for an equal future.
  • RAwarrior
    RAwarrior Community member Posts: 430 Pioneering
    @Lou_Scope

    Welcome to the community?

    I agree with your comments about self care. I really enjoy spending time with wildlife and just being outside really helps to lift my mood?

    I started a Squirrels and Friends thread if you are interested in seeing some of squirrels and other wildlife that I feed??

    I also like photography so I enjoy interacting with wildlife and taking pictures of them.

     I also find that gardening and reading also helps?
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    Another one I just saw, posted by the Mental Health Foundation 

    National Campaigns Officer, she/her

    Join our call for an equal future.
  • Lou_Scope
    Lou_Scope Community member Posts: 21 Courageous
    @RAwarrior
    I would love to look at the squirrels and friends thread. Coincidentally I am at my sons rugby training and two gorgeous squirrels have run past. I took a video of them both. Autumn is a beautiful season. ??
  • RAwarrior
    RAwarrior Community member Posts: 430 Pioneering
    @Lou_Scope

    That’s really great and they are really sweet animals ?

    I originally started posting photos of the squirrels in the Wildlife and Photography threads so there are quite a few photos in those threads?
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    edited September 2020
    @Lou_Scope @RAwarrior

    Just to make them a bit easier to access, I've linked the two threads below :)

    Squirrels and Friends

    Wildlife Photography
    National Campaigns Officer, she/her

    Join our call for an equal future.
  • RAwarrior
    RAwarrior Community member Posts: 430 Pioneering
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    I just saw this, posted by the Zero Suicide Alliance: 'a month of mental health awareness'. I'm going to try and keep up with them when I can. You're all more than welcome to join me! I've listed the dates below the picture, as I don't think it's very accessible.


    10th September: have a virtual cuppa with a friend or colleague 
    11th September: cook your favourite meal
    12th September: reach out to someone you've not spoken to in a while
    13th September: have a lie in, recharge your batteries
    14th September: use an app to guide you through meditation
    15th September: listen to your favourite song
    16th September: take 5 minutes to complete the ZSA Step Up module 
    17th September: who's been there for you in lockdown? Show them you care
    18th September: try making a healthy version of your favourite takeaway today
    19th September: check on an elderly relative or friend
    20th September:put on your favourite outfit to feel great!
    21st September: write down three positive words affirming who you are
    22nd September: listen to a song that makes you remember a happy time
    23rd September: take the ZSA Gateway module training
    24th September: reach out to a friend or family member. How are they?
    25th September: find a new, healthy recipe, and make a delicious dinner tonight
    26th September: organise a games or quiz night
    27th September: take time to do something you love, such as a craft, yoga class, or going out for a coffee
    28th September: list things you're grateful for in your life
    29th September: listen to a song that reminds you of someone special
    30th September: set aside 20 minutes, and do the ZSA Suicide Awareness module
    1st October: perform an act of kindness for a friend, relative, or neighbour
    2nd October: cook for a friend or family member
    3rd October: spend time with your favourite person today
    4th October: move your body! Get active in your own way for at least 30 minutes today
    5th October: reconnect with nature. Visit your favourite outdoor spot
    6th October: listen to music that motivates you
    7th October: identify a new skill that you'd like to learn
    8th October: reorganise your space- change-up your perspective
    9th October: make some cakes or biscuits ready for tomorrow's Big Brew 
    10th October: catch up with the same colleague or friend. How has their month been?
    National Campaigns Officer, she/her

    Join our call for an equal future.
  • Markmywords
    Markmywords Community member Posts: 419 Pioneering
    I'm surprised that disability hasn't been covered properly in the factors that can affect one's ability to go on.

    Both mental and physical disability can lead to grief. That can be grief over losing your self-image, your abilities, your faculties and your potential future.

    Aside from that, depression is either from internal or external factors and can range from having no trigger at all to being a totally appropriate response if you are trapped in a life situation you cannot change.

    Depression is not always a disease.
    Depressed people are not always sick.
    Sometimes it's their situation that needs treating and the rest will follow.
    During depression, the ability to see and make changes is much reduced and this is where help is needed.

    If you "wouldn't do it to a dog," don't do it to a human and blame them for not wanting that situation.
    This is why The Samaritans don't tell you that you are faulty and need fixing.

    Tea and sympathy is just step-one to helping people. They can then find a way out if there is one.
  • RAwarrior
    RAwarrior Community member Posts: 430 Pioneering
    @Markmywords

    My experience might differ from other people. I have had physical disabilities for a long time. 

    I have Rheumatoid Arthritis and Osteoarthritis. 

    Whilst having a diagnosis of Rheumatoid Arthritis along with the severe pain which is caused by RA I suffered from some anxiety but generally I thought I had coped really well with having RA.  I had a very positive attitude which means along with the medication I take had helped me to manage my condition.

    However, as I have outlined on several other threads, my mental health issues stem directly from being bullied and harassed at work for several years by one person. I now have PTSD as a result.  

    Not only do I have PTSD but when I get upset, have flashbacks, nightmares all of these things and increase my joint pain so one illness directly affects the other?

    I tried not to think about the physical effects that RA had on me when I was diagnosed and I really pushed myself in order to successfully manage my condition. 

    However, one of the many things the bully would do is to draw everyone’s attention to was my physical condition but not in a way that would help me. He would humiliate me by saying “you haven’t aged well.” He would refer to disabled people as “sickies” and target disabled people? These things would not only humiliate me went on to affect my self esteem and confidence.

    I went from being someone who took pride in working especially with a serious illness such as RA to someone who felt completely broken?

    So in my case the mental health issues stemmed not from my actual disability but because the bully targeted me because firstly he could and because I am disabled?

    I know a lot about RA and many patients do suffer from depression because of some of the reasons you have mentioned. However, in my case I got PTSD as a direct result of what happened at work.

    As I was already disabled when the bullying started I didn’t need “an additional illness” if that makes any sense.

    Had something been done to stop the bullying and harassment instead of a series of managers covering it up then I probably wouldn’t have PTSD?

    I do try to do things to improve my mental health issues but if only people would think before they target disabled people who already have enough to deal with?
  • Markmywords
    Markmywords Community member Posts: 419 Pioneering
    I suspect that if you weren't there, he'd have picked a different victim. We are seen as a soft target even by the government paid to protect us.
  • RAwarrior
    RAwarrior Community member Posts: 430 Pioneering
    @Markmywords

    Unfortunately the bully has been bullying people at work for at least twenty years. Management just move him and cover it up instead of stopping him?

    He is teflon coated because whenever anyone tries to challenge him he accuses people of racism when it’s not true.

    He has also managed to get several managers to feel sorry for him so even with a history of actual physical violence towards other staff (not me thankfully) he is still employed, still protected my managers who would rather protect him to the detriment of others who just want to do their job and like me not end with an unwanted mental health condition?
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    You're totally right that both the experiences of having an impairment and being disabled by society can lead to mental health problems @Markmywords!

    Unfortunately, there's not a huge amount of research into this area, and I also wanted people to be able to share their own experiences on this thread. I have found some information though: 
    I agree that opening up casual conversations is just the first step, but hopefully a step that can help people to see that there is a way forward.

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts! I think it's a really interesting discussion to have.
    National Campaigns Officer, she/her

    Join our call for an equal future.

Brightness