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Help with reaching out to trauma support?

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  • Cher_Alumni
    Cher_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 5,741 Disability Gamechanger
    @Francis_theythem Just to add that I hope your appointment goes okay today  <3  
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  • Francis_theythem
    Francis_theythem Community member Posts: 120 Pioneering
    I did really well in the appointment, I was really able to talk about what's been happening, but she didn't diagnose me. I kinda hated that because I just felt like everything was just unanswered, and it's so complicated and confusing that I feel like I need that. It's all really scary and upsetting and I feel so isolated and alone. I asked my gp to send me to a psychiatrist for diagnosis.
    After I opened up to my psychologist I suddenly feel the compulsion to talk about it a lot with so many people. I guess it's like it just started to all come out and now I can't stop it
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    I'm glad that you felt able to talk about everything that is going on @Francis_theythem

    I know this might not make you feel any less frustrated, but rest assured it's very normal not to get a diagnosis in your first session. Psychological therapists tend not to be able to officially diagnose mental illness, depending on their qualifications and role, but that doesn't mean they can't help you. They often prefer to be experience-focused rather than diagnosis-focused. It's good that you spoke to your GP, hopefully you'll be able to speak to a psychiatrist and get a diagnosis soon. It's totally understandable that you'd want one so that you feel less alone, but remember that your experiences are valid even without an official diagnosis.

    In the meantime, try and ride the wave of beginning to open up and trust your therapist. You can also bring up your feelings around wanting to be diagnosed. I reckon she'd probably want to know more about that. 

    As always, you're welcome to vent here :) 
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  • chiarieds
    chiarieds Community member Posts: 16,007 Disability Gamechanger
    It's great to read you did well with your appointment @Francis_theythem . You might feel it a small step perhaps, but that first bit of progress has been made. You'll likely not get all the answers straightaway, that might be too much to take onboard anyway, but it looks like you'll get there. It must feel like once you've started talking, it's all bubbling up inside you, & you want to get it out. Trust in yourself, your therapist & GP; you're a team, together things will come together. :)
  • Cher_Alumni
    Cher_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 5,741 Disability Gamechanger
    @Francis_theythem How are you feeling today? 

    I think what you said about opening up and not being able to contain your feelings any more is totally understandable.  The analogy of a boiling pan helps me around this.  Think of a simmering pan where your thoughts and feelings are the water that has been bubbling up inside for a while.  When you reach the point of getting help, things have often become a little too much, so the water has started spilling over the sides of the pan and you can't hold it in anymore!  It's beneficial to talk though and I'm sure your friends and those around you would want to support you through this.  

    It will get better I promise, one step at a time  <3 and well done for taking that first step.
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  • Francis_theythem
    Francis_theythem Community member Posts: 120 Pioneering
    I had a seminar today (online) but when I saw them I started crying because I felt so alone. Maybe talking about it yesterday brought up some feelings of just feeling really isolated from everyone because of switching.
    It was fine for most of the seminar though, more importantly no trauma got triggered so I'm really glad about that. A couple of hours after the seminar I was still feeling really alone though, and my module tutor's pretty cautious and careful about wellbeing so I emailed him just cause I wanted to tell someone about things around me. And he was really supportive about it. I felt much better and also relieved after that, so now I'm fine:) 
    I suppose with me, because it's incredibly complicated, I need some framework to make sense of things, and without it I'm still as lost and isolated. Maybe I was feeling so alone because I talked about it but still don't understand what's happening. Therapy won't start for a bit, because she said she needs to talk to clinical lead to figure out which therapy is best for me.
    It does feel like that. I avoided dealing with it for a while and there's a lot of stress and trauma so maybe it's not surprising.
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    Apologies for the late response @Francis_theythem.

    Your module tutor sounds great! How are things going at uni now you've had a bit more time to process everything?

    What you've said about wanting a framework to better understand everything makes total sense. Hopefully it won't be too long until your therapy starts :) 
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  • Chloe_Scope
    Chloe_Scope Posts: 10,586 Disability Gamechanger
    Sounds like you did really well @Francis_theythem! It cannot have been easy. How are you feeling today?
    Scope

  • Francis_theythem
    Francis_theythem Community member Posts: 120 Pioneering
    I've been feeling a bit more stable recently. I think therapy might be starting next week, I have to rearrange with them though because they picked a time my domestic care call is >< Nervous about it, I know it will be a very good thing for me, but I'm still anxious.
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    It's understandable that you'd be nervous, but remember how well you did last time @Francis_theythem! It's good that they're getting it sorted so quickly too. Let us know how you get on! Have you read any articles on what you might expect from your first therapy session? 
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  • Francis_theythem
    Francis_theythem Community member Posts: 120 Pioneering
    No. I think I'll be okay after the first one though. Because my psychologist thinks I have autism, I referred myself for that too.
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,488 Disability Gamechanger
    I think you'll be okay too @Francis_theythem :) In case it puts your mind at rest at all, Mind have some information on starting therapy. It sounds like you're on the right track for getting the correct diagnoses and treatment! Let us know how it goes.
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