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Adjusting To Home Aids

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lisalouise999
lisalouise999 Community member Posts: 10 Connected
edited October 2014 in Disability rights and campaigning
I am 27 (as is my husband) and I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome with pain and mobility problems. Up till now our bungalow has been free of any accessibility aids, I walk with a stick or crutch outside and use a wheelchair for things bigger than the corner shop. Today the council sent a man to install some things to help me in the home. I have a single bed loop, a bathboard and a toilet frame. My problem is that my husband is quite against these items. He sees that I manage without these things so seems to believe that I don't need them. He specifically hates the idea of the toilet frame and feels embarrassed by it. I can understand his feelings but having used the frame today, I'm finding it really helpful. Its making me use the right muscles, causes less pain and i feel more confident that i won't misjudge the loo and end up on the floor. Do you guys have any advice?
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  • milo
    milo Community member Posts: 129 Pioneering
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    You need to explain how much safer you feel with the aids. I have the same devices, plus a few more and they've given me a huge amount of confidence and independence. As for any embarrassment, when my teenage stepdaughters have friends round, they find nothing awkward about showing their friends how the toilet frame folds back or how the controls work on the adapted shower etc.

    It may be that what your husband finds hard is that he feels having the aids means that your life together has ended up differently from how he always envisaged it and that he is focusing on the adaptations as his way of dealing with it. You need to explain that the toilet frame etc doesn't change things, but they make it safer ,much less difficult and hopefully less painful.

    Good luck and keep us posted on how it goes.
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  • lisalouise999
    lisalouise999 Community member Posts: 10 Connected
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    Thank you so much for your comments here. I missed them at the time but I really appreciate that you took the time to reply!
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