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Sexual service for disabled people?

I'm 31 and live in the North East and I'm a very sexual person.
I'm not disabled at all but was wondering if there is anything like an escort service for disabled people or somewhere people can go to meet disabled people and help them explore sexually?
Just I have spoken to a few disabled people who are really shy and withdrawn and feel they can't explore there sexual side because of their disability.

Replies

  • bambam Posts: 331Member Pioneering
    [email protected] welcome to the community . I think disabled people have problems exploring their sexual side because our disability affects our confidence. Our lack of confidence makes us a little shy and withdrawn. It's hard for us to meet people because it's hard for us to go out and socialize frequently.
  • AlexAlex Posts: 1,325Scope Team Scope community team
    Welcome to the community. Whilst I agree that disabled people should have the same opportunities as everyone else (and that includes sex) what you're suggesting worries me. There are lots of legal and safeguarding aspects that need to be considered very carefully. This website is not for selling services like that.

    Instead I would encourage you to find out more about charities already working in this area. Perhaps you could financially support them instead?

    Here are some suggestions:
  • PSHEexpertPSHEexpert Posts: 167Volunteer community advisor Pioneering
    Hi!

    Thanks Alex for linking to Outsiders - I started writing a response to this first thing and then a student came in so I had to stop.  I agree that this is a very complex issue that needs to be considered very carefully; it's not something that is appropriate to just be offered as you suggest, precisely because of the legal, ethical and safeguarding issues that are involved.   Private arrangements between consenting adults are one thing, of course, but the sort of provision you're offering would, by necessity, be subject to scrutiny.

    I would suggest that if you are interested in supporting people in their sexual and social lives, you start, as Alex suggests, through supporting an already established, registered organisation, operating under governance and with clear policies and guidelines. These are in place to protect everyone involved and are essential.
    - Gill 
  • markitorowlandomarkitorowlando Posts: 8Member Listener
    Alex said:
    Welcome to the community. Whilst I agree that disabled people should have the same opportunities as everyone else (and that includes sex) what you're suggesting worries me. There are lots of legal and safeguarding aspects that need to be considered very carefully. This website is not for selling services like that.

    Instead I would encourage you to find out more about charities already working in this area. Perhaps you could financially support them instead?

    Here are some suggestions:
    http://enhancetheuk.org/enhance/sex-and-disability/

    Alex, I would like to correct you on one thing that the selling of sex itself is not illegal. Street sex working is illegal. but I can see your point about safe guarding 
  • markitorowlandomarkitorowlando Posts: 8Member Listener
    I have 18 years of personal experience in this area so I will be happy to help anyone else who thinking of going down this route. I think I have unique an approach to this subject being as I am using the sex industry myself. And yes this route is not all joyous experiences because there is a few things that you need to watch for as sadly within this industry you can have issues with people who has no morals and respect for others. Also you have to think about what you want to get from this route. Like for me it's alternative to having a relationship as I do still seek to find that special someone but I am fully aware that it might not happen. I have had a few relationships as well but those didn't turn out to be a long lasting relationships and two of those were with abled bodied women. I believe that it is important to support someone like myself who has quite severe physical disability with none verbal communication because I think it increases less of a chance of forming an imitate relationship. I say imitate relationship because I have no trouble forming a friend relationships because I am extremely sociable person with quite good confidence. But I feel there is a point that people don't realised with my severe physical disability I have got the ability to have sexual needs. Even friends which have been friends for years was completely surprised to find out that I have have sex! Therefore I have chosen to use sex workers as survival tool for my insanity and I feel that if you have the knowledge to make it crystal clear in your head what are you doing getting a sex workers you can have the best of both worlds if you do it right. many 
  • TopkittenTopkitten Posts: 943Member Pioneering
    There is a very popular site for locating and arranging sexual and non-sexual encounters but I won't give the name. I use it sometimes occasionally sometimes regularly and have had mostly good but some bad experiences. However it is an option.

    I have been single for 12 years and will not drag any woman down the route I have to go, so relationships are not something I will consider. I often have female friends but these friendships have an annoying habit of encouraging the lady to ask for more, at which point they collapse. However, I am not a monk committed to celibacy. Plus when I first used the site (some 8 years after my last partner left) I was desperate to know what my capability was. It is an expensive habit but probably no worse than most people spend on drink, gambling and dating.

    A disability centre I used to use encouraged the younger people to date but tried to steer them into situations with rather more common sense than most people use when finding someone for themselves. Ofc the number of people at the centre was not large so it was not always possible to find good matches.

    There are always options but it is as fraught as dating in it's success rates.

    TK
    "I'm on the wrong side of heaven and the righteous side of hell" - from Wrong side of heaven by Five Finger Death Punch.
  • jamey77jamey77 Posts: 10Member Listener
    TLC trust offers some fantastic non judgemental services for disabled persons of all types and has very caring proffessional supportive persons who usually have backgrounds in a  caring field. 
    They are a respected national organisation for disabled persons and can be accessed via outsiders organisation also ☺
  • TopkittenTopkitten Posts: 943Member Pioneering
    I looked into TLC trust and generally it seemed a good idea but the availability for my part of the country was poor at best. Most of those I looked at are on the site I have used anyway. Quite a few of the escorts on that site do offer services to disabled clients but generally have no real experience of dealing with the disabled as it is a minority part of their work. Most do not have special facilities themselves but will visit their clients at home thus avoiding the problem. It can, however, be difficult to find those that are really good with the disabled but then that is common in just about everything.

    TK
    "I'm on the wrong side of heaven and the righteous side of hell" - from Wrong side of heaven by Five Finger Death Punch.
  • MarkmywordsMarkmywords Posts: 397Member Pioneering
    While I have too much damage for this to have any relevance to me, I do know that quite a number of independent Escorts have a great deal of experience in helping disabled clients. Sometimes the usual carer waits in another room for safety.

    More of it goes on than one would assume.

    Due to the welfare risks it's not something that should be considered without a proper understanding.
This discussion has been closed.